My momma’s bff is a big old freak

I'm not gonna flex.

Flex.

Fine.

Flex.

I am flexing.

Can you get him out of here or what?

Well, if it's going to occur after school, then it's not within my jurisdiction because I'm the school's security guard and not the world's security guard.

Come on, man.

I don't like trying to stop terrorist *******.

I'm just asking you to do your job.

You're asking me to do the job of security guard after three when I'm not even...

You're telling me that there's nothing you can do.

You could just CPR.